Fear of being alone.

I’ve always imagined, especially as I’ve watched my own aging father, that old age would bring about loneliness. All of your friends may die, leaving you as the only one left. Your spouse has passed on or you’ve never married and there are not many relationships left, for various reasons. Each human soul, to some extent, is a personal life force that fears being alone. We need human interaction.

This fear of being alone is not just relegated to those over 80. It is very real and maybe even more prevalent in today’s world. Cell phones and electronic devices provide great information in an instant; you can check all your newsfeeds, all your social platforms. But some experts suspect that this speed of delivery has actually done more to erase actual personal human connection.

The United Kingdom has appointed a Minister of Loneliness to combat what they see as an issue. One article shared the Prime Minister’s sentiment: “For far too many people, loneliness is the sad reality of modern life.”

David (of David and Goliath fame) didn’t have a cell phone; nor did he need a Prime Minister to diagnose his current condition. In Psalm 142 we see him expressing a loneliness that mirrors what we feel today. 

Look and see, there is no one at my right hand; no one is concerned for me. I have no refuge; no one cares for my life. // Psalm 142:4

No one at my right hand:

David is sharing a truth about what type of person makes you feel like you are not alone. That person assists you to give or uphold your strength. “There is no one at my right hand.” To say, “my right hand,” refers to a position of strength. There is no one who has any strength or resource to add to my troubled situation. David (or you and I) may have many people around us, but if the people around us are not willing or able to add strength or support to our life, it is as if we are alone.

No one is concerned for me:

This phrase refers to a person who not only is able to recognize you at a glance, but they can look more closely at you and see changes. They recognize that you look more excited or more stressed than normal. They have a deliberate and focused attention toward you, so much so that they can spot when life is “off” for you. David lacks a person of concern.

I have no refuge:

To have a refuge is to have a place where you can be completely safe: emotionally safe as well as physically safe. I have an aunt and uncle who live close by. If I stopped into their house today, that time in their home would be a refuge for me. They would sit me down at the kitchen table. Without asking, a plate of food would be offered to me—and probably a beer too. I have always felt 100% wanted at their house; I feel safe with them. 

David is expressing the deep, human need to have people and places where you can feel safe. But in his current situation, he has no one.

No one cares for my life:

This expression is defined by frequency. Is there someone in your life who is there on a constant basis? They check in with you every Tuesday morning: “how are you today?” This type of person has forged a regular trail of friendship and care for you. On this final point, David claimed that he was still lacking. 

In the end, God remedies his life (1 Samuel 22) by providing a slew of other people who are also being marginalized and assaulted. They band together and provide a system, a fellowship, a source of camaraderie that was not there before.

Then the righteous will gather about me because of your goodness to me. // Psalm 142:7

May God also shower his goodness on us so that we are surrounded by other humans who genuinely care—and so that we genuinely care about them too!

God’s richest blessings.
Pastor Al